Monday, April 5, 2010

Hey! It's ME!


OMG! Dru did something impossible and cool! He sent me a blurry picture of me with Flat Stanley! How'd he do that?! WHY AM I BLURRY!? Well, he wrote this:
Ryan,

I'm sorry I have to do this right now. This is a picture of you, blurred as you are becoming extinct. You, as a work of fiction have been completed. And this picture is the best thing I can do to demonstrate how you will fade from my psyche, by showing you physically blurring out and going away with the picture of your beloved Flat Stanley sitting in the foreground. You will probably say that you are excited that the adventures are all going on, but you will have no more adventures. Let me be clear, you intentionally innocent and ignorant being, that you are no more. It was a blast. And I will remember you fondly. But you will slowly be absorbed by me, and you will become me, no longer having your own fictional mind.

Your creator,

Dru Johnston


Well... I guess that's that guys. Flat Stanley has had a lot of adventures for sure! And all my relatives are so helpful in my projects! Well... guess I gotta go now... I WANT PIZZA!

I also need a Drink.

Goodbye, Ryan. And thank you.

Apple Juice?!


Look at this! Flat Stanley won't be thirsty these days cause of all that drink! Dru told me that this is what he drank when he came up with me and what he continued to drink when he wrote as me!

I don't know what that means actually... Dru's starting to sound creepy... and I get a sense that he smells like my grandpa.

Flat Stanley on a website!?! WOWZA!


Cousin Dru just sent this picture! It's Flat Stanley sitting in front of a blog that Dru has made. He also sent this note!
Ryan,

I don't think you got it. You're not real. Please listen to me. I need to you to recognize that you are nothing more than a child in my imagination, in a lame attempt to work out some of my issues and give me easy access for a few blogs. This picture I'm sending you is not real. That is Flat Stanley that I found on the internet and endowed it to you as your flat stanley, but this picture was made exclusively in photoshop. I want you to know that you were excellent for my needs and a terrific plot/blog device, but know that you are purely fictional. Please stop ignoring that.

Your Creator,

Dru

BOY OH BOY GUYS! Dru loves writing me letters! I can't wait to see what sort of Flat Stanley Adventure will happen next!

This is Cousin Dru! With a Letter!

This is Flat Stanley with my Cousin Dru all the way in New York City! Look at how excited Stanley is! And not only did Cousin Dru send this picture, he also sent me this note:
"Dear Ryan,

I don't know how to tell you this... but I guess I just have to come right out with it. You're a fictional character. I created you for a blog project I made called Year of the Blog. You do not exist outside of the walls of the blogosphere, and for that I am sorry. I am aware that you are not the brightest child in the world (as I made you that way), but I want to make it very clear that you will cease to exist after four posts in this blog. And just to prove to you that you are fictional I've taken a photo of myself holding the same toy that you yourself are holding in the only picture ever taken of you. In a sense, that picture is just a ridiculously excited and idiotic version of myself. I wish I didn't have to let you know that you were merely a vehicle for myself to point out strange depressing things in our culture, but I have... and I want to thank you for giving me this opportunity, and for making it so easy to create three different state blogs. You have been a fun invention... but know now that it is over.

Sincerely,

Your Creator"


BOY! What a fun letter! Flat Stanley is going to have a lot of fun on this adventure! I can tell!